I have to get this out. I can’t let my coworkers know, since secrets suck, so Tumblr, by my witness.

I have a large crush on my boss. 

This is my first job out of college. This is the first time I’m working full-time in design, the field that interests me, and the first time I’ve worked underneath somebody whose intelligence I respect. First time I actually have respect for my boss.

And it’s turning me on.

He’s cute, yeah, but he’s way too old for me (39/22), and his personality is frankly the type of person I wouldn’t go on a second date with. But this ancient, primitive part of my brain has latched onto him as a focus for sexual energy, and I hope to grab his glance all throughout the workday. I feel an electricity when he’s over my shoulder, critiquing my work.

Yesterday we were moving a computer around, and we bumped into each other, me crouched under the desk, and afterwards I looked around the office, wondering if anybody noticed my obvious attraction is to him. I glance at him and try so hard to not think about my wet panties.

He is gregarious, and acts towards all employees as he does towards me, so I don’t think it’s mutual. At lunch the other day, in a non-political conversation I emphasized my interest in gay rights  (I’m a woman,) trying to throw him off my scent. 

But it’s so obvious. So damn obvious.

His taste is way different from mine. And he’s really not in my category of people I could love. But I have a crush on him for one reason:

I respect him, and he has power over me. 

I happily obey.

(Hot.)

(However, I need to get laid elsewhere, since this isn’t a good way to stay employed and productive. Or will this constant sexual tension make my work all that more fun? I can keep a secret, right? :)